The Five Second Rule
Making changes in your life, even positive changes, can be daunting. However, they don’t have to be. Una Rice has some ideas to get you started.
When Melanie (Mel) Robbins couldn’t get out of bed in the mornings, repeatedly, she knew she had a major problem. The family business was gone and bankruptcy loomed, she was bickering with her husband constantly, and not only had they lost the college education fees for their children, they could now lose their home as well. It was the low point in the former criminal defence attorney’s life. One riddled with shame and fear.
And Robbins was now frozen in despair as she struggled to just get out of bed in the morning, face the day, and do constructive things that would propel her onwards.
That all changed one night when she glanced at the TV and watched NASA footage of a rocket launching into space.
A realisation suddenly hit her. That’s what she was going to do – literally launch herself out of bed like a rocket. This was all about moving quickly so that her brain didn’t have a chance to convince her to snuggle back beneath the duvet. The following morning she used a countdown method – 5-4-3-2-1 – before leaping out from beneath the covers.
Robbins who’s now an established speaker, famous for her five second rule, and motivates others to take control of their lives, says it’s all about ‘metacognition’- outsmarting your own brain, before it tries to convince you to keep safe and tucked up under the duvet.
And the five second countdown can be applied to tasks you know you should do, but are putting off . Next time you feel hesitant, or have a great idea that you let die because you have frozen into inaction – try using the 5-4-3-2-1 method – and launch yourself into taking the next baby step forward. Action can feel terrifying. But it can also be liberating, and it can get you out of any rut you find yourself in.
1>> BE A BOLD-ILOCKS Why is it often so difficult to do something radical with our hair? Our hair is our crowning glory but often we stay in a bit of a rut with the same style for years and years. Take that block of black colour that emerges through years of dyeing hair. Over time, against pale skin, black hair can be very harsh, so why do people find it so hard to get rid of it? Why do we all have a tendency to become attached to something we don’t particularly like?
A scary – but life changing – idea is to put yourself in the hands of a recommended hairdresser and go for something radically different. Ask for suggestions and ideas.
Don’t be afraid to experiment. Remember, cut hair will grow back and colours can always be changed. Being bold with one’s appearance takes courage. When we’re trying to lose weight it can take a while to see results, but hair is something that can be instantly changed and it makes you feel better about yourself right now.
2>> REDEFINE YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH ALCOHOL Alcohol can be one of the scariest subjects for us to really consider truthfully because some people have genuine addictions. If we don’t have a problem with alcohol but we have just become habitual drinkers, needing that few glasses in the evening to relax, then we do sort of have a problem. Especially if it’s been going on for a while and the cycle can’t be broken. The whole idea of having an alternative to alcohol is something that can support you so much if and when you decide you’ve had enough of the sore heads in the morning.
De-alcoholised drinks have become more sophisticated over time. Widely available, you can now enjoy the non-alcohol versions of all your favourite drinks – gin, prosecco, beer and wine.
An interesting idea before you reject these versions outright, is to know that while they are not going to taste the same as what you’re used to, you can easily replicate the ‘feelings’ of enjoyment you get while you drink them.
The non-alcoholic prosecco still has a cork to pop, a huge fizz, and is refreshingly cold out of the fridge. Once you get over the idea that the taste is slightly different, you can embrace and enjoy these great alternatives – and continue to drive, forget the groggy head and perhaps even lose some pounds as a bonus. Enjoy them in your favourite gin or champagne glasses and you might find that after a couple of weeks of these alternatives, you enjoy sleeping better, being able to drive and a clearer head.
3>> TAKE ON A WINTER PROJECT With only two months left in the year, how do you plan to leave this year behind and embrace the new one?
Often we can struggle with a long, cold winter. The dark days can feel gloomy and overwhelming. So it’s always good to have an ongoing project to get you through, particularly if you suffer from any season adjustment disorders.
Gardening has been found to have many benefits, from contributing to overall fitness, to improving mental health, to the sense of wellbeing you get from improving something, and the sense of accomplishment that follows. And we’re not forgetting the sense of wellbeing that comes from being in the fresh air and nature, and being up close to the changing seasons and the elements.
It can be daunting and scary looking out and wondering where on earth you will begin. Having a focus will give you purpose as you go about your gardening, even if you have never done it before.
Winter projects include planting rows or circles of bulbs, clearing out an area for herbs, creating a meditation zone with weed cover, pebbles and solar lights. Or preparing an area for no-dig vegetable beds. You can do this by covering an allocated area with paper and cardboard, and it’s best done at this time of year in advance of spring planting. Your fear of tackling something in the garden has many rewards and can be overcome.
And if you look out your window now and still feel hesitant or scared…try counting 5-4-3-2-1.