Happiness is…

When I planned the BIG Happiness issue I didn’t realise what a great positive experience it would be for all of us at Woman’s Way. We have been writing, editing and reading all things happiness over the past few weeks and, firstly, as someone who has written a lot about happiness and the pursuit of it, I learned a great deal. It was also so lovely to spend time exploring something that is so important at this moment in time. I was pleased that Dr Mark Rowe (aka Dr Happiness) agreed to write the scene setting feature for us, I spoke at his conference for World Happiness Day a number of years ago. So I asked some of the team to write about what happiness means to them… and here it is.

Norah x 

Carissa Casey

I’m definitely a happy person these days and I say that with the confidence of someone who knows what it’s like to be miserable. Most of what I know about happiness, I’ve learned during times when I’ve had a really bad knock or nothing seemed to be going my way. There are things I’ve found I can do to help myself feel happier no matter what life is throwing at me. Human connection is really important. Chatting to people whether friends, family or the woman behind the counter in the shop. Eating well and exercising always makes me feel good. Making time for what used to be called hobbies. Gardening is my thing. It’s hard work and sometimes frustrating but there’s something really magical about watching plants grow. I started learning the piano during lockdown. It’s slow going but it really helps me switch off from whatever might be bugging me on any given day.  What’s helped me most of all though, particularly when times have been really tough, is meditation. I got into it a few years ago but forgot all about it until last year. I was diagnosed with breast cancer a month before the lockdown. There was so much uncertainty around the surgery. I couldn’t have a reconstruction after the mastectomy and then there were complications which meant follow up surgeries. At one point I really felt like I was going off the deep end so I started meditating again. It really helps calm me and once I’m calm nothing ever seems that bad. I’m cancer-free now and that whole episode just seems like a bad dream. It’s true; everything passes.

Rachel Spillane

Looking back pre-covid, happiness was something I definitely took for granted. Living for Friday nights where we would dance till dawn, squeezed onto postage-sized dancefloors and sharing lipstick with strangers in the loo! It all feels like a dream now. Life was whizzing by and there was no time to stop and smell the roses. There would always be time for that down the road. The phrase ‘life is short’ is something we all say but don’t really think about. And I didn’t. Until Feb 2020 when my grandmother passed away. Mary Head was from a different generation, at 89 she had been around for the Blitz in London. She knew how precious life and time were. A real character. Her favorite song at 89 was still ‘You Sexy Thing’ by Hot Chocolate and she insisted it was played at her funeral. Her passing had a big impact on me and coupled with multiple lockdowns, I found myself ironically enough, ‘stopping to smell the roses’ and I liked it. Newfound happiness has meant that I started taking walks on the Pier in Dun Laoghaire, without my headphones, and seeing how the bay sparkles when the sun hits off the sea is a magical feeling that gives me deep-rooted contentment. Spending more time with my family and in my own home has shown me that happiness is focusing on all the good in your life and being grateful for it at the moment. And most importantly I now know happiness is no longer just for the weekend.  

Caoimhe Mahon

When you look up the word ‘happiness’ in the dictionary it reads as a noun where one is in a state of feeling or showing pleasure. However, that state of pleasure differs from person to person therefore, I think true happiness is unique to an individual. When asked what happiness means to me my answer is simple. Happiness is my family, my friends, the laughs we enjoy together, the moments we cherish and the memories we make. I am incredibly lucky to have such incredible and inspiring people in my life. Each day we are granted together with our health and our safety is one of happiness. Happiness, for me, is not material. It is being content and appreciative. It is the little things in life, birds singing in the morning, a moment of embrace from a loved one, a chat over a cup of coffee. When I need advice about something, a shoulder to cry on or an ear to listen I know that I have someone to turn to. When I want to share good news, celebrate my victories and laugh I know I have someone there. To me this is happiness, having people in your life for all these moments. Having that companion through life is true happiness. So, when asked what happiness means to me I will not name an item or something material. Happiness is life’s most precious moments, life’s most pure and simple moments spent with the people most important in the world to me. 

Roisin McBrien

Pre-Covid, I think I would have said that my happiness lay in the blurred lights of a bar or nightclub, small measures of alcohol thrown back with friends, laughs and conversations over music that pulses through the floor and up into your limbs. Socialising and meeting new people every weekend, only to never see them again. When our social lives dissolved due to the pandemic, my sources of happiness began to shift and simplify. We have no choice but to take pleasure in the little moments in life, these days. For me, I find happiness in walks around Carton House with my dad. We try to explore a new trail each time we go out and it is a lovely bonding experience. I enjoy perching at our kitchen island and watching reality TV with my mam, laughing, and imagining ourselves as Gogglebox participants. I love spending time with my dog, who is in the autumn years of his life. He brings me so much joy just by existing, and getting to spend the day with him while working from home makes me very peaceful. I find happiness in the little chats I have with my brother while we drive to get coffee (another comfort of mine). Also, my friends have been a major source of happiness throughout the last few months. Meeting up for a socially distanced coffee or walking for hours throwing a ball or frisbee to each other has given me an ample amount of excitement and elation each weekend. Those are the sources of my happiness in these difficult times. WW