Have you ever wondered why more and more people are talking about journaling? The secret is out that journaling helps reduce worry and anxiety, leading to better sleep, clarity and focus. Creating a journaling habit, writing about your thoughts, feelings and especially potential solutions is proven to improve self-awareness and increase self-confidence. Journaling expert Maria Burke explains all.

How to get started with journaling

Children and teenagers love to write, draw and to colour. It’s relaxing. It improves creativity and brings them joy. Into adulthood, we, for various reasons, such as self-consciousness, lack of time, prioritising other tasks, stop writing and doodling, thus denying ourselves the simple pleasure of spending time with pen and paper and the benefits this brings.

If you haven’t written in a diary or journal before, or you have taken a break for a while, journaling can seem daunting. You may wonder what to write, how to write down your deepest, private, thoughts and feelings? Is there an optimum time of day? How often do you need to journal to get the best outcome? Exactly how do you get started?

Use a notebook or journal that you enjoy writing in. Maybe it has a nice cover, you like the paper – perhaps it’s the only one you can find right now! How to start – simply begin. When the impulse to journal strikes, don’t wait. Get going now.

Self-reflection brings self-awareness: Self-awareness leads to self-confidence

Honest self-reflection means you clearly understand yourself. You know your strengths and weaknesses. The purpose of self-reflection is to discover, accept, analyse and harness solutions. If you’re affected by low-confidence in any area of your life, self-reflection delivers you clarity of thought to prioritize and find the best way to deal with challenges and worries.

Why written self-reflection? When negative beliefs and thoughts worm their way into your mind, they go nowhere. You need superhuman effort to switch from constant worry to positive thoughts and feelings. Writing down your thoughts and feelings in a notebook or journal is like doing a spring clean of your brain. You get to clearly recognise the good and bad, you accept yourself as you are, know your value and find ways to feel more confident.

What is confidence anyway and why do we need it?

Self-confidence is an internal resource that means you thrive in the world. When you feel confident, you’re comfortable in your own skin – life flows.

Lack of confidence is a waste of valuable thinking time, a waste of energy… Low confidence means you’re not making the most of your life – how can you be when your productive time and energy are taken up with ‘lack of confidence’ thoughts?!

We need confidence to get things done, to feel happy and valued, to solve problems – to thrive.

Journaling to unearth new layers of self-confidence within

Here’s a 6-point formula to use journaling for confidence. Answer honestly when you write.

These are my strengths.
List of my weaknesses.
Here are situations where I feel less confident.
What are my options to feel better?
What have I learned from this exercise? (hint: is the gap between strengths and weaknesses less than previously thought?)
What one small action will I take to feel better about myself?

Journaling to help you feel better about yourself

Gratitude journaling gives the greatest possible benefit for the shortest amount of time invested. Just write down what you’re grateful for – list three to five things.

Gratitude journaling is where I started, many years ago, in my twenties. Going through a tough time at work, lacking in confidence, searching for tools to cope, I read somewhere about the benefits of gratitude. I began to list 5 things I was grateful for every day – in the morning, and, also, in the evenings. I was so excited at the positive mindset change that happened, I told anyone who would listen and only recently an old friend told me she still uses gratitude journaling to relieve her stress and to feel better.

Be specific and honest as you write, so your list has more meaning. If you enjoyed a good night’s sleep, a delicious morning coffee, a walk, a chat with a friend, a hug, write those things down. Go deeper and write why you’re grateful; how this makes you feel to reinforces the positive thoughts in your mind.

Within a short time, expressing gratitude becomes a habit. Write daily, weekly – whenever suits you. Build this lifelong habit that you can fall back on whenever you need a boost.

FACT: When you’re focused on what you’re grateful for, your mind is not worrying about self-confidence.

How to love yourself more with journaling

This is another tool I discovered in my twenties, when friends and I, having no spare cash usually wore the same clothes to night-clubs on Saturday nights, as we did to work. At one stage a good friend had some serious competition from glamorous Pamela Scott Girls for a particular guy. No matter what we tried, our combination of outfits just didn’t measure up. Serious bouts of low-confidence ensued. I read somewhere about the power of writing down positive affirmations – swapping negative thoughts for positive statements. We decided we needed to love ourselves more. We wrote on post-its I love myself. We pasted them all around the apartment – on mirrors, beside the kettle, on the fridge. Each time we spotted a post-it, we said ‘I love myself’. It was great fun – a brilliant way to journal. Write in your notebook, on post-its, wherever suits you, and remind yourself that, you do indeed love yourself.

Expressive writing to resolve difficulties and find solutions

Expressive Writing involves writing about whatever issue is bothering you for 20 minutes for four days in a row. Describe how the problem ie lack of confidence, is affecting you, your career, your relationships, your health, and wellbeing. Four days in a row is recommended, not prescriptive. Writing for just 15-20 minutes three of four times a week about the same or different problems, has been found to help people resolve difficulties and feel better. The key, as with all journaling methods is to write honestly.

Daily check-in to build self-confidence

Using a journal for a daily check-in does wonders for clarity, self-belief and confidence. Try this method:

What worked well for me today?

What didn’t work well?

What will I do differently tomorrow?

What brought me joy today?

This daily check-in brings awareness of your achievements so you feel good about yourself, as well as clarity and learning. Ending on what you’re grateful for or what brought you joy, takes your brain to a positive place as you conclude your daily check-in.

How to achieve your goals and aspirations with journaling

Writing in detail about your goals, means you’re more likely to achieve them. If your goal is to build self-confidence, you’re more likely to achieve that by writing in detail about your strengths, weaknesses, options and actions you’ll take.

Maria Burke has created a range of guided journals to help make journaling easier and more effective, including gently guided bullet journals, notebooks and free downloadable journaling kick-starters. Visit waywordsjournals.com.

Journaling and Self Reflection