The limelight is probably the worst place to nurture a loving relationship. But there are exceptions, couples that make us all believe that true love does exist. So what’s their secret?

TOM HANKS & RITA WILSON: 36 YEARS

Tom is famous for weeping at awards ceremonies while declaring his undying love for Rita. He shared the reason they’re so happy together in an interview with Oprah Winfrey: “ The success of our relationship was a matter of timing, maturity, and our willingness to have an intimate connection.” His willingness to pour his heart out to anyone who will listen might help a bit too.

GEORGE CLOONEY & AMAL CLOONEY: 9 YEARS

George never thought he’d find true love until he met Amal.

“Sometimes in life it doesn’t happen on your schedule, but you find the person that you were always supposed to be with,” he told the Hollywood Reporter in 2017. “ That’s how I feel, and I know that’s how Amal feels.” Could it also just be about chemistry? George always makes everything sound so easy.

JEFF GOLDBLUM & EMILIE LIVINGSTON: 8 YEARS

The story goes that when Emily met Jeff she didn’t know who he was, despite his Jurassic-sized fame. Their relationship quickly flourished, so fast and furious was the rapture that the couple went to therapy to make sure their union would last and that marriage was a good idea.

Perhaps to make sure Jeff was ready to commit to a third marriage? “Some people like to play games and play hard to get but we were just honest and aware from day one and took our relationship day by day,” Emily posted on Instagram in 2018.

HARRISON FORD & CALISTA FLOCKHART: 20 YEARS

“Harrison and I laugh a lot, and humour is everything to me,” Calista explains. Harrison’s advice for a long-lasting relationship is “don’t talk” and instead “nod your head” – oh, and do your chores.

A relationship based on… tongue in cheek?

BRUCE WILLIS & EMMA HEMING WILLIS: 14 YEARS

“I think we've always had a lot of respect for each other, which has really helped build a great foundation,” Emma told Us Weekly.

“He makes me laugh. He's funny and he's smart, and nuts, and always keeps me on my toes, so it's fun.” Bruce and Emma, who’s 23 years his junior, renewed their vows in 2019 for their ten-year anniversary, with Bruce’s ex-wife Demi Moore there to celebrate – as she had at their wedding.

MICHAEL DOUGLAS & CATHERINE ZETA-JONES: 24 YEARS

Michael Douglas credits Catherine for making their relationship work: “Catherine has a great sense of humour and is not a demanding person,” he said in the past, adding that he is more patient than he was in his first marriage.

Catherine, for her part, says Michael showed her “how to conduct a busy life without being so self-centred that everything else goes by the bye.”

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RUPERT MURDOCH & JERRY HALL: 6 YEARS

Little is known about what makes this relationship tick; what we do know is that Rupert was in his mid-80s when they married. A 2016 Guardian article stated that what Murdoch is said to like in Jerry is her sense of independence; apparently she can “match if not out-do him” with stories from her life at dinner parties.

Jerry apparently said, before the two met, that both Texans and Australians “are quite strong, hardy people”. Kindred spirits perhaps, although they disagree on a topic that’s well known for tearing families apart: Donald Trump.

EMMANUEL & BRIGITTE MACRON: 29 YEARS

Straight out of the pages of a New Wave film script, Brigitte and Emmanuel fell in love when she was his secondary school teacher – she’s nearly twenty years his senior. Against all odds, the two kept in touch and eventually got married, after Brigitte completed her divorce. He’s now the President of France and they are inseparable to this day; she’s his proverbial rock, and advisor. To keep the flame alive, Paris Match reports they make a point of setting time aside for a date night once a week.

BEYONCÉ & JAY-Z: 21 YEARS

Jay-Z cheating on Beyoncé was big news when it happened, which he explained in 2017 to the New York Times Style Magazine: “So even with women, you gonna shut down emotionally, so you can’t connect…. In my case, like, it’s deep. And then all the things happen from there: infidelity.” Not every couple would have survived such a bombshell, but they’re not like other couples. They were platonic friends for a year-and-a-half before they started dating. “We were using our art almost like a therapy session,” said Jay-Z in the same interview.

WILL SMITH & JADA PINKETT SMITH: 27 YEARS

Will and Jada rely on the old adage that it takes self-love to love another. “Without self love, all one has is their ego which gives a false sense of personal power through its brutal and unkind nature. The ego will never fail to strangle the love out of one’s heart if we allow it to take center stage in our relationships,” she wrote on Instagram in February 2019.

KEVIN BACON AND KYRA SEDGWICK: 35 YEARS

It was love at first sight for Kevin, but not for Kyra. Still, it didn’t take long for her to fall, er… head over heels for the Footloose star. Kyra now calls their relationship “a treasure”, in awe of their love: “I'm constantly amazed that we are still surprised and interested in each other,” she said in the past. “You grow together and learn more about each other. I think the trust gets deeper and the dependency gets deeper, which is scary.” Perhaps not being afraid to give themselves up to each other is their secret to everlasting love.

ELTON JOHN & DAVID FURNISH: 28 YEARS

“We go through difficulties as much as anybody else does in a relationship, but we sort through it by communication,” Elton said in a confessional love video by R&B artist 6LACK. “And one way of communicating is writing down on a piece of paper or a card how you’re feeling.”

“Every Saturday we gave each other an anniversary card, because we met on a Saturday,” said David in the same video. “You write about the week that’s passed and the week that’s coming, and you connect and you tell each other you love each other.”

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GOLDIE HAWN & KURT RUSSELL: 38 YEARS

Goldie says she’s in it for the long haul with Kurt because they haven't tied the knot, giving them the freedom to choose to stay in the relationship. But there are other key ingredients that make their relationship an undying one: “Love, gratitude, compassion, because sometimes every man or every woman will drive their partner crazy. Family. Fun. Laughs. Sex,” Goldie told People magazine. But at the end of the day, she says there is no secret:

“You’ve just got to want to be together.”

VICTORIA & DAVID BECKHAM: 25 YEARS

Power couple extraordinaire, David and Victoria love to gush about how much they adore each other, especially through the romantic medium of Instagram. But there’s little known about what makes their relationship last despite the many rumours of infidelity (strongly denied). Perhaps

David best described it when he said, on the social media platform: “I was lucky to meet someone who has the same drive and wanted the same things in life.”

MATTHEW BRODERICK & SARAH JESSICA PARKER: 30 YEARS

SJP said in a podcast in 2016 that the reason she and Matthew stuck it for so long is that they spent time apart. “I know this sounds nuts, but we have lives that allow us to be away and come back together,” she said. She talked about it two decades earlier in a New York Times interview: “It occurred to me that [spending so much time together] our world would become very small. There was always something nice about sharing your experiences. Now, all of a sudden our experiences are the same, and I don't feel like I'm bringing a lot to the table.”

OPRAH WINFREY & STEDMAN GRAHAM: 36 YEARS

Oprah is a powerhouse of a businesswoman and entertainer, and her career is everything. Finding true love in Stedman meant finding the right balance of support and independence – for both parties.

In fact the couple believes that if they had tied the knot, their relationship wouldn’t have lasted because of Stedman’s traditional views on marriage.

When promoting his book a few years ago, Stedman told Ellen: “When you have a good partner that’s able to self-actualise their potential and you’re able to self-actualise yours, one and one equals about six.”

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DENZEL & PAULETTA WASHINGTON: 39 YEARS

Being grateful for what you have, in a spiritual sense, is probably the key to Denzel and Pauletta’s enduring love. Denzel told The Guardian in the past that relationships are hard work.

“But we made a commitment. A spiritual foundation helps everything - marriage, work, peace of mind,” he said. And raising children was a big part of that: “We try to instil the positive influences we got from our parents: in our case, church, school, humility, volunteering, the importance of helping others.”

JULIA ROBERTS & DANNY MODER: 21 YEARS

Letting someone into your life can teach humility. Or so Julia told Harper’s Bazar in 2017: “I was my priority, a selfish little brat running around making films.” She credits meeting Danny and having his children as the turning point in her life: “When I think about what makes my life my life, and makes sense and just shines inside of me, it's him. Everything has come from that for me.” Self-effacement could therefore be what her secret is, although she more candidly told a podcast in 2018 that they simply enjoy each other’s company – he is her “favourite human”. Don’t ask about other life forms.

AENGUS MAC GRIANNA & TERRY GILL: 18 YEARS

This couple is probably the most elusive to pin down, as little has been written about their marriage or their relationship. Aengus retired from news broadcasting but is making a televised comeback with a stint on Dancing with the Stars and a documentary with long-time friend Anne Doyle, who also happened to walk him down the aisle to marry Terry.

They live on an alpaca farm – Terry’s hobby and one he thought up as a recession income supplement.

So what keeps them together? They’re both looking fit so let’s say fresh air and a healthy outlook on life.

PRESIDENT MICHAEL D & SABINA HIGGINS: 48 YEARS

When asked about the secret to a happy marriage, Sabina told the Irish Independent in 2015: “I think an understanding of life. You occupy a big world. And you are not dependent on the other.

We are so very committed to each other, but we are also very committed to humanity and to the world.” And it helps that they share common interests. “We both love literature. We like drama and music.”

NEVEN & AMELDA MAGUIRE: 20 YEARS

Amelda is Neven’s life partner, training at the gym with him (doing it right, so he says) decorating his restaurants. “We have a lot in common,” she told The Independent in 2018. “We enjoy the same things. Travel. Food. Simple stuff with the kids.” Enjoying the minutiae of daily life and being grateful for them, it’s clear the secret to their success is that they don’t sweat the small stuff .

DANIEL & MAJELLA O’DONNELL: 23 YEARS

Daniel O’Donnell didn’t know what hit him when he fell in love with Majella. They grew close very quickly. He just as speedily took a step back. After all, she was divorced, and he couldn’t consider marrying outside the church. But his love for her made him realise that “life is not black and white”. The secret to their success has to be their deep belief in their transcending love. “My thought was if God put someone in my life that gives me joy, why would he do that if that is wrong?,” he said speaking on the 2021 RTÉ documentary Daniel at Sixty.

CHRIS O’DOWD & DAWN O’PORTER: 13 YEARS

When the couple first met, Dawn’s career was nosediving and Chris’ ascending, which was a blow to Dawn’s confidence. They got married and Dawn even added an O’ to her last name to take on something from her husband yet not lose her name. Now, they’re both in a good place, she as a writer, he as an actor, both as young parents. The secret to their everlasting love is probably, quite simply, honesty.

AMY HUBERMAN & BRIAN O'DRISCOLL: 16 YEARS

Amy and Brian met at the height of their careers – in fact Brian first laid eyes on her when he was watching the Late Late Show. He told Sky Sports News in 2011 that he “technically stalked” her and the rest is history. Three kids later, what makes the couple stick together? It could be supporting each other when they need it. For example, after Brian retired from rugby, Amy would work into the night to write and he’d wake up with the kids to make that possible, she told the Irish Independent in 2015.

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